A talk by Rabbi YY Jacobson based on Chana Levitan’s book “I Only Want to Get Married Once”
- Do we share the same basic goals and values?
- Am I relating to the person I am dating or have I created an image of them that I’m relating to?
- Can I admit that he has flaws and can I identify what they are? Am I honest about my own flaws?
- Does our relationship have healthy boundaries?
- What do people who are close to me think about him?
- Do I respect him? Does he respect me?
- Can I be open and honest with him? Do I trust him?
- How is our communication? How well do you get along?
- Does this person bring out the best in me? Does my life become more meaningful and inspired in his presence?
- Is he flexible? Does he know how to compromise? What size is his ego? Does he like himself? Is he a mensch?
- If he never changes, do I still want to get married to him?
